BUILDING A SUCCESSFUL PRAYER LIFE: SITE PREPARATION

What would you say if I told you that there is a way we can lead more fulfilling lives.

How about if I told you that you could know yourself and God with more clarity in a way that changes your life. Would I have your attention?

Communication, a.k.a., prayer, is the key. Let’s call prayer a conversation with God because that’s all it is.

One of the things that is often overlooked among Catholics and our denominational counterparts is an exhaustive look at prayer. We’ve learned our formal prayers but that’s not what I am talking about. I’m referring to you having a real, ongoing, authentic conversation with Christ that will change the way you interact with both God and yourself internally.
Prayer is not taught, at least not in a way that really engages us. Over time we seem to hit a stone wall. That’s just my opinion.

Many of us struggle with prayer, and this should not be the case. It's certainly not God’s plan that we find it difficult to communicate with him. Our verbal prayers might often include endless recitations of formal lessons learned as kids without any meaningful reflection. Maybe we have not seen our prayer lives evolve over the years. Maybe that’s you…….

What I hope to do over the next few months is to take a look at prayer and how we can use it to create a more dynamic spiritual, and at the same time, emotional interior life.

When you think about it, conversation is the foundation of relationships between humans. Without conversation there is no relationship and without good conversation we have all kinds of problems. We have probably witnessed some failed marriages and relationships because of poor communication.
There is, indeed, a big difference between good and poor conversation.

Conversation is at the heart of how humans maintain relationships. Thus, if we do not have good and healthy conversations we can expect some kind of relationship crisis. 
Our conversations also include content. Sure, some of our communications are spontaneous but more often than not our conversations are directed towards a specific end. There is subject matter to our conversations. We have things in common, interests that connect each of us at certain levels. It’s no less different with Christ.

My point is, we enter discussions with content and without content our conversational talking points are superficial.
“Nice day today isn’t it?”
“Did you watch the ball game?”
“What are you doing this weekend?”

Relationships are not maintained nor do they grow with superficial content. We start with the basics in our conversations while acknowledging that a healthy ongoing relationship has to evolve. The same can be said about our conversations/prayer time with Christ.  

How we add content to our conversations and the really meaningful ways we all can use our formal prayers to deepen our contact with God will be discussed in future posts.

Several years ago I began to wonder if I was on the right track in my own prayer life. We were in the midst of a pandemic and finding a good spiritual director was out of the question. so I began to read material from two of the greatest minds on prayer in Christendom, St. Teresa of Avila and St. John of the Cross. 
What surprised me the most is that I have been following their techniques for many years without knowing it.

Why should we care?

1. Your Life depends on it: St Teresa was adamant on that. She is the foremost authority on prayer and felt that it was the tether, the foundation of our entire spiritual existence. Our spiritual core is not service; it is not doing good deeds it is prayer. Without it we are easily pulled astray and our end is very dubious.   
2. Apathy:  Apathy is dangerous. If you don’t care about cultivating a better relationship with Christ, then stop reading. I cannot fix your apathy. I will say that Christ himself had some very harsh words for apathetic believers. Revelations 3:16
3. We become known: God knows us all, but what Jesus is referring to is this “knowing by association” with himself. Read Matthew 7:21. I don’t know about you but I want to be known by God in a real way. I want to share my life with his. Prayer is the bridge between human and the divine.

You might say that I pray enough?

1. That’s a fantastic start! But is your prayer life dynamic? Do you lack conversational points and substance when you pray?  I think we all get bored with monotony. I love my formal prayers like the Our Father and the Rosary but I often I find myself needing more substantive content when I meet with God. I need to bridge the gap between my thoughts and my heart when I’m alone with my Father.
2. Does your prayer life challenge you? I want to feel as though I am learning and evolving when I pray.
3. Do you feel as though God is distant when you pray? Sure sometimes this distance is inevitable. However, over our life, this should be the exception and not the rule.
4. Does prayer change you? Are you becoming more self-aware? St Teresa could not emphasize enough the importance of knowing yourself. Prayer always leads to self-discovery. In prayer, God often reveals himself to us through an intimate view of our own lives.
5. Are your prayers rote? Are you conversing with God or simply reading back to him some prayer using someone else’s words? God wants to hear what YOU have to say. Our conversations with God should not continually be a recitation of words from a great saint.  Scripted discussions, a.k.a., formal verbal prayers with God have their place but God also desires that we truly share our hearts with himself. One of the things God most loved about David was his open hearted attitude.  He conversed with God.

Think about the conversations you have with those you love. We can develop those same skills and apply them to our time with God.

Prayers that transform us are like a slow meandering walk in a park and not a foot race. It takes time to get there but the pace dictates the journey. So move slowly and enjoy the walk. God wants us to meander in our time with him. If you follow along over the next few months and try some of the ideas presented don’t expect to see dynamic changes in just a few weeks. Trust the process and give it time.
I will remind you that prayer is work, but it pays priceless dividends to those that cultivate its fruit.

In the book “Conversations with Christ” the story is told of a small girl who, after they reception of her first Holy Communion, was questioned by her parents as to what she had done when she arrived back at her pew and bowed her head in prayer. She said that “I prayed for Mommy and Daddy, and for my sister and brother and then I recited the alphabet to Our Lord and told him a ghost story.”
We might smile at the over simplification of the story but the author mentioned an important point.
The little girl was actually talking to Christ and that's what prayer is...

Over the next few months my hope is that your words AND interior thoughts align to produce a richer conversation with God that can enhance your life. Future discussions will include examples of prayer, the when, where and the how-long of prayer, different prayer styles, and a brief look at meditation. Finally, we will conclude with a discussion on the difference between verbal and interior/non-verbal prayer.

As a footnote, a good compliment to this series on prayer is the book “Conversations with Christ” by Peter Rohrbach. The book draws heavily from St. Teresa and St. John of the Cross. I can attest personally to the veracity of the content as presented. I’ve been living it for years.

Be on the lookout for future posts as we continue the series “Building a Successful Prayer Life.”
A compliment to this series can also be found by clicking on the two links below
video format of this post
Parish youtube channel